Glass hailed from the sky that night
I couldn’t hide to save my life
Standing drenched in open wounds
You took my hand and pulled me through

I want to give you everything I’ll give you my all
Because you gave me, you gave me your lips a gentle kiss
The medicine to cure my pain

Listen to all of this glass shatter
It pierced my ears and made them bleed
Now it sounds so beautiful, cause your beautiful
———————

Hahah, this lyrics sounds so emo but its nice!

Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
It’s like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me

I could have done this like past few days but lucky I didn’t. Only played with my switch blade.

Anyway, this past 2 days were quite the bestest days during the week. Never felt so high even though today is a total bore. Test marks are very very disappointing except for chemistry. Gotta buck up fast.

Now I’m having cramps on my calves because of yesterdays skipping. I did it like crazy. Stupid me. And now trying to find motivation to study! WHY CAN’T I STUDY????

Gotta get out from this prison and get some fresh air!

I’ve been trying to ignore the best parts of you
But I’m still hoping that I’ll be with you somehow
I’m sorry but I can’t forget about the way I feel
Every time you’re here.
What would it take for me to be with you
I swear I’d rip my heart out if you said you’d be impressed, please be impressed

————————————

Today was rather weird. Or more of people seeing me as being emotionless. Wow, I’m troubled.

And amazingly I managed to stay awake the whole school day even how boring it gets.

Ms Tia was asking me if I’m okay or not because I react to her question with a poker face. It’s like a whole 10 secs on me but it felt super long. Omg am I that obvious?

Then during Social Studies, we got a total lecture from Mrs Tan. It’s once in a while kind of talk. This also because we did badly for our SS paper which for every 1 girl fail, 4 boys fail. Thats the statistics in our class. You do the maths. And during the whole lecture, she mostly stared at me. OMG THATS FREAKING SCARY!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I literally screamed out loud in my heart while doing that. And when we collected our papers. She gave the others with low marks much talking about their mistakes. My paper was super super CLEANER than theirs! It’s like marks only and no point out where my mistakes were. Also no conclusion statement at the back of my answer paper. And she’s like asking me if I’m okay also. OMG THIS IS FREAKING ME OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!! AM I FCUKING TROUBLED TO PEOPLE!!!!! I wanna cry but cannnot. Laughter hides my pain. Sigh. That’s why I laugh randomly recently.

Okay, aside from that weird concerns, A Maths paper was pretty easy. Sacrificed recess to study a bit more. And I thought the last question was improper and did wrongly. But still get method mark! Should be around 26/30 I think!

I need hugs and a shoulder to cry on…

Saat yang aku dengar cerita cinta aku.
Aku mula lihat pada kau.
Tidak tahu ia begitu membutakan.
Kau dan aku tak pernah bertemu.
Tapi macam lama kami berkenal.

————————

Sorry for the Malay sayings. If you’re smart enough you should know .

Today I felt soo much better. Going to school moody(I hate emo) wasn’t a choice since I’ll soon just keep talking with Anderson. That started after Mother Tongue. Then lessons were as per normal. Jermaine thought I was not okay via Jabrina. Jab also asked me. Am I that obvious? Tsk tsk.

Anyway, Malay class was the best. We kinda slacked and did our work. Talked about the end of the Earth because of stupid solar storm. I don’t mind dying. There’s nothing to live for when you don’t get anything you want. But first of all, I just want to experience adulthood for a moment. The stress, workload, love, family…etc.etc. It’s a change from the normal childhood. And by love, that would not be monkey love but I don’t count liking you as monkey love. Ahaha . Apart from that, Naufal and I wished we could make a mass kill for those who want to die early. It’s more of you and me kill each other at the count of 3 because suicide is just a straight path to hell! So no mass suicide! <3 Death. zzzzzzzz

Bio test was pretty easy. Not that I can get full marks but heh, it’s good for a great mark! And and I got 15/15 for my matrices test. It’s nearly the whole class :O!

Tomorrow POLYNOMIALS! Gonna ace it ;D!